Life is too short to let society tell you when to enjoy your ice cream, but there’s something almost magical about offsetting the heat of the sun with a creamy, delicious scoop or a classic ice cream sandwich. Or for breakfast as you hover over the sink before darting out the door.
No matter what polite society says, there are very few bad times for ice cream. But there is no time for a bad pun or stale Instagram captions. So, retire the old “I scream for ice cream” and use once of these ice cream puns and jokes instead.
We’ve gathered a whole lotta puns that will have you struggling to play it cool.
The Best Ice Cream Puns
Pick-up lines and quick puns
- Wanna spoon?
- You make me melt.
- Anything is popsicle if you believe.
- Cone-gratulations.
- I don’t cone-done that behavior.
- I love you un-cone-ditionally.
- Ice cream is legendairy.
- Today’s forecast is sunny with a chance of sprinkles.
- I love ice cream a waffle lot.
- All in one fell scoop.
- I’m losing cone-trol.
- Ice cream puns are mostly plain vanilla.
- Some ice cream puns are sweet, some are nutty.
- Get to the pint, already!
- Hurry! The dessert parade is starting, and I don’t want to miss the ice cream float!
- I’m such a softie for ice cream.
- You and I were mint to be.
- I don’t play flavorites when it comes to ice cream.
- Do I love ice cream? You sherbet I do!
- Just another manic sundae.
- Go shawty, it’s sherbert day.
- No need to have Breyer’s remorse after buying ice cream.
- Eating large quantities of gelato is my hidden Talenti.
Ice Cream Jokes
- Did you hear about the ice cream bandit? He’s one smooth cream-inal.
- What’s a deer’s favorite ice cream? Cookie doe.
- What’s Dracula’s favorite ice cream? Vein-illa.
- What’s an electrician’s favorite flavor? Shock-o-late.
- Why do ice cream cones make the best journalists? They always get the scoop.
- What’s the snobbiest ice cream? Popsicles. They always have a stick up their back.
- What’s an ice cream’s favorite dog breed? A daschundae.
- The key to being successful in ice cream? You gotta sweet the small stuff.
- What ice cream flavor is never on time? Choco-late.
- What do you get from an Alaskan cow? Ice cream.
- Knock Knock! Who’s there? Ice cream. Who? Ice cream if you throw me in the cold, cold water.
- What do you get when you divide the circumference of a bowl of ice cream by its diameter? Pi a’la mode.
- Why was the mint ice cream so good at poker? Because it had so many chips.
- How does Reese eat her ice cream? Witherspoon.
- What are an ice cream’s favorite lyrics? Halo darkness, my old friend.
- What a metalhead working at an ice cream store called? Alice Scooper.
- What’s a pig’s favorite ice cream brand? Hoggin Daz.
- Why is ice cream so bad at tennis? They have a soft serve.
(Very) short stories
- I wrote my dessert-ation on ice cream.
- The ice cream truck blew a tire driving down the rocky road.
- I got out of the ice cream business. I just didn’t like working on sundaes.
- The ice cream had to go to court after it got served.
- I got to go to Italy and eat ice cream, I won the gelato-ry.
- The popsicle said to his son, “Stick with me, little one.”
- I tried looking up ice cream puns on the Internet but then my browser froze.
- When the ice cream princess married her prince, she became a Dairy Queen.
- A thief broke into the ice cream shop and stole all 31 flavors. It was a Baskin-Robbery.
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